everyone is talking about the mayan calendar and all that end of the world stuff. well i for one wish it was over. im tired, im sick and i have had it. i want to wake in Olam Ha Bah. i want to know what it is for everything to go right for once in my life. i would like to walk with Yehsua and have all my questions answered. i would love to learn all i can about everything and keep it all in my mind forever. i want the pain in my body to be gone. i want the memory of the pain so the joy of it being gone is all the greater. the idea that we need bad in order to feel good. i think that we need bad to know that good will always overcome the bad. we needed to know that whatever happens we will always be loved. according to Jewish faith we know that the Savior, Yeshua is coming back. when He does, the World will become Olam Ha Bah, the world to come. also those who chose a life outside of God will go to a bad place for one year. we also know that years in the spiritual world are as a day in our world and visa/versa. we also know that some who were virgins and followers when they died will go to heaven, 144,000 virgin jews. i can stop crying tears of sadness or anger when He comes for us. for once in my life there will security. this mass in my chest will be a thing of the past. i can have all my body parts back. my mind will be whole and my loved ones will love me. it will be hard knowing for the first year some of them will be in hell. i wonder if i will be able to see them. i know it will be for their good. i once had a jew tell me the bible for this life and there was only this life, when you die thats it. he was obviously out of touch with his heritage. it will be the great Sabbath. i will be healthy rather than too thin or too fat. living without ibs will be nice too. being able to build something wonderful knowing that it will go well and i will be able to avoid it falling apart. i will have a home that i will be able to live in forever. we will each have room in the New Kingdom. the world will be without pollution.there will be only one ruler and we will be able to follow all rules at all times. i can get rid of this anxiety and fear and worry too. its the worst of it all. it makes me cry. things of fantasy will be as real as we want them to be. everything will be spiritual. it will be nice to go to home where everyone there loves me just as they did in winnsboro, sc. we can have feasts and parties and good times. and the wonderful thing is there will be no death. my fear is this world will be filled so much hate that love will be hard to find. my great joy is that one day hate will not exist. i do hate this life and i do love the next one. im feeling pretty sad. being so close to death makes me wish it was over and done. being worried all the time does that to a person. being behind on the bills. living in substandard housing. having problems with my bank account. it will be nice to know there will be no more bullying bcs there will be no more pain. we will laugh at pain but only bcs it will be gone. no more loan shark aka title/payday loans. i want you to be happy. thats one reason why i want this to happen so much. but i know that only The Father knows when that will be, but all the talk makes me think about where i want to be so much. i hope this brings you joy bcs ilu

December 21, 2012 at 08:47PM